Greetings Glitter Crew,
This year I am jumping for joy as I celebrate the BIG 4-0! It’s a milestone as a child that I perceived to be centuries away. I remember baby sitting at the age of thirteen, the parents of the kiddos I watched were in their forties, and I thought to myself, “I will never get that old.” But here I am, crossing the same threshold. However, I don’t feel old, not even the slightest.
Instead, I feel vibrant, full of life and constantly asking myself, “I wonder what I’m going to be when I grow up?”
After my twenties, I adopted the mentality that every year is a celebration of life, not 365 days of dread. I looked forward to each following birthday because I always got a chance to reflect on how much I’ve grown and evolved. I don’t believe wrinkles are signs of aging, I see them as wisdom.
Of course my body can’t seem to keep up with my soul. As I’m typing this I need a dentist visit for a cracked tooth, my knees pop after a steep downhill hike, and don’t get me started about the sagging boobs, these girls have seen better days in their early 20’s. But despite the wrinkle lines around my mouth from a bazillion smiles, my soul is filled with delight as it rejoices on life’s glorious moments.
As a gift to you, I want to share four life lessons I learned after each decade of living.
Decade One: Despite the Environment, You Control the Outcome
When I was twelve, my father was arrested for child abuse. The first decade of my life was littered with traumatizing moments. I often walked on eggshells around him. It was important to not interrupt the football game or else his temper flipped like a switch. Before I knew it, I could hear the jingle of his belt buckle coming undone to whip me. Or worst, the rummaging of kitchen utensils, as he looked for the best spatula to leave a mark.
There were lots of tears at home and bruises I covered up. Despite the trauma, whenever I left the house, I told myself I have a choice to be happy. I didn’t want anyone at school to know what life was really like at home and the only way to feel joy was to smile.
After my father’s arrest and the public knowledge that home life wasn’t perfect, I remember hearing many adults repeatedly say “Kids raised in an abusive environment make poor choices in life and often end up becoming abusers themselves.”
I made a conscious decision at a young age, I control my own outcome. The environment will never mold me and dictate my actions. Instead, I have the power to choose good and make a path for my own success. Out of high school I proudly graduated with a 3.99 GPA (curse the A- in Spanish) and ranked 27 out of a class of 758 students. But the most important statistic, I love my two boys with all my heart and have never laid a finger on them.
- The Lesson: you have a choice to either be a statistic of your environment or the result of your own choices. Either way, it’s your decision and YOU control the outcome.
Decade Two: Your Dream is the Only Dream that Matters
In college, I studied to be a doctor. However, I hated needles and the sight of blood.
I completed all the pre-med classes and they destroyed me. College was the brutal football game that High School didn’t prepare me to tackle. But I continued to plow through with every strategy and tactic possible to finish.
The turning point was when I was sitting in the campus library registering for the Kaplan Prep Course to take the Medical College Admission Test [MCAT]. I stared at the blinking cursor over the $2000 registration fee. Then it suddenly hit me, I did not have a dream to be a doctor.
My mother, who loved me with all her heart, did not want me to have her same life. She was a single mom, without a college education, raising five kids on a minimal income. Her one repeated lesson. “Linda, if you become a doctor, you will have a better life and can support your family.”
At this moment, I made a choice, if I’m going to pursue a career, it needs to be MY dream. I knew if I didn’t love it, I would lack the motivation to keep going. I graduated with a Bachelors and spent the next decade trying to determine my true path in life.
- The Lesson: be honest and ask yourself, “Is the dream I’m pursuing today MY dream, or does it belong to someone else?” Who are you trying to please? Are you trying to gain acceptance from parents, a spouse, roommate or friends? Please don’t wait twenty years to realize you are not pursuing your dream. Decide today, what sets your heart on fire, and pursue it with all your being.
Decade Three: Be Strong, Make Your Voice Heard
After college, I continued working in sales jobs. I learned at a young age, that strategic effort produced rewarding results in the form of commission checks. I became addicted to bonuses and annual President Club recognition.
Moving up in the corporate leadership environment, I managed many sales teams. I learned to motivate my reps by empowering them to conquer life’s obstacles. I knew if they had confidence in themselves at home, it would naturally fuel their work results.
As an Asian Woman, working in a predominantly Caucasian Male Environment, I had to learn how to make my voice heard. I used to believe if I just worked hard and ensured my team hit their numbers, they would “see me.”
This dream of “If I just did the work, the recognition would follow,” was 100% false. I learned the hard way after being passed up for promotions and raises when I knew I earned it.
I finally made a switch when a leader said to me, “Linda, when all the executives are in a room, you want your name to be on the table. You need to ensure you are seen.”
Moving forward, I learned to walk into executive offices to demand promotions and raises. In addition, I prepared my meetings with pages of concrete data to backup my request. Finally, I learned to not play it small and let my voice be heard by standing at the table representing the needs of my team.
- The Lesson: if you wait to be seen, you will go unnoticed. When you feel undervalued and not recognized for your efforts, make your voice heard. Stand up proudly with confidence and ask for a seat at the table. Come prepared with facts to back up your requests and roar like a lion from the rooftops.
Decade Four: Trust a Higher Power, You Can’t Do This Alone
Throughout my adult life, I spent 18 years denying there was a higher power. I put religion in the back seat, while I positioned career and wealth at the front. I believed I was happy. Unfortunately, that was the narrative I told myself.
If it weren’t for my amazing husband who raised our two boys while I flew 3 times per week, my children would have been neglected.
One year, I had more Marriott hotel nights, then I did staying at home. I knew it was not sustainable, but I kept pushing forward. I poured my soul into my work ensuring my team hit their numbers to help the company go public. My business dominated the market and I continued to tell myself, I was happy.
One 5am morning, as I was leaving to the airport, my five-year-old begged me with tears, “Don’t Go Mama.” At that moment and the events that followed, are what lead up to me resigning my successful corporate job.
Looking back on decade two, when I left the doctor dream, I spent the last twenty years searching for my real dream. However, the search was buried under wealth and status gain. It wasn’t until 2016, that I realized I have always had talent making things with my hands and it was time to pursue what truly set my heart on fire, creating A Dash of Adorable.
Becoming a soloprenuer, I learned an important lesson. In order to pursue my life dream, I needed to rely on a higher power. After coming to this realization, I prayed for the first time in decades. I changed and put my trust in God by welcoming religion back into my life. This transition has been the most important lesson I have learned in my entire life.
As of today, I see the world differently
Now I create products dedicated to make a difference for one person, instead of worrying about others judging me.
During LIVE Virtual craft sessions, I have stopped fearing if I will say something wrong. Instead I share what is in my heart to help anyone who needs to be reminded that they are loved and their life is worth living. I believe my work is a service that is blessed with talents given to me from a higher power. I am committed to not let those talents go to waste.
- The Lesson: you are blessed with unique talents that make you special. You have a gift that needs to shared with the world. And the only way to succeed is by trusting there is a higher power that has your best interest at heart. Remember to believe life is not happening to you, it is happening for you. Let this higher power guide you on your next journey, he will carry you in your darkest moments towards the sunshine.
My beautiful friends, a bazillion thank yous for celebrating my fortieth with me! The fact that you have read this far fills my heart with delight! If something stood out to you, please share this message on social, pin it for others to read, and forward it to a loved one.
I would also love to know what life lessons you have learned at your own milestones, please comment below with your takeaways to help others!
Linda Larsen
Chief Glitter Officer
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